The Power of Keeping Your Goals to Yourself: A Case Study

Kamran MansoorKamran Mansoor
7 min read

Have you ever set a personal goal and immediately felt the urge to share it with friends, family, or even social media? You're not alone. The impulse to share our goals is deeply ingrained in human nature. It's natural to seek support and validation from others, but is this always the right approach?

In this article, we'll explore the psychology of goal sharing and how keeping your aspirations to yourself can be a powerful tool for achieving them. We'll delve into the science behind this approach, discuss the importance of setting SMART goals, and offer strategies to maintain your motivation. By the end, you'll understand the art of strategic sharing and how it can contribute to your success.

The Allure of Sharing Goals

Sharing your goals with others can feel exciting. It provides a sense of accountability, encouragement, and often, a motivation boost. When you announce your intentions, you may receive praise and support, which can be highly rewarding. However, this initial euphoria might not be as beneficial as it seems.

The Psychology of Goal Sharing

The False Sense of Accomplishment

When you reveal your goals to others, you experience a premature sense of achievement. This feeling can trick your brain into thinking you've already made progress. Consequently, you may become less inclined to put in the necessary effort, as your mind perceives the goal as partially fulfilled.

Fear of Judgment

The fear of judgment is another reason people hesitate to keep their goals private. It's natural to worry about what others will think if you don't succeed. This fear can lead to anxiety, self-doubt, and even abandonment of your goals.

The Science Behind Silence

The Role of Dopamine

Dopamine, the brain's reward chemical, is released when we share our goals. This can create a false sense of accomplishment, making us less driven to work towards our objectives. Instead of seeking external validation, it's crucial to focus on intrinsic motivation.

The Power of Intrinsic Motivation

Intrinsic motivation, driven by personal satisfaction and fulfilment, is a more sustainable force for achieving your goals. It doesn't rely on external praise or approval, making it more resilient in the face of challenges.

Setting SMART Goals

To effectively keep your goals to yourself, it's essential to establish SMART goals:

  • Specific: Clearly define your goal.

  • Measurable: Determine how you'll track your progress.

  • Achievable: Ensure your goal is realistic.

  • Relevant: Align the goal with your values.

  • Time-Bound: Set a deadline to create urgency.

The Importance of Accountability Partners

While keeping your goals private is beneficial, having an accountability partner can be invaluable. Choose someone you trust to hold you responsible without judgment. They can provide support without creating premature gratification.

Harnessing the Power of Visualization

Visualizing your success can be a potent motivator. Instead of sharing your goals verbally, create a mental image of your achievement. This will keep you focused on your aspirations without seeking external validation.

The Magic of Writing Down Goals

Putting your goals in writing has a transformative effect. It solidifies your commitment and serves as a tangible reminder. When you write your goals down, they become more concrete and actionable.

Avoiding Self-Sabotage

The Fear of Failure

The fear of failure often arises when we share our goals. To avoid self-sabotage, acknowledge that setbacks are a part of the journey and not indicative of your worth.

The Comfort Zone Dilemma

Sharing goals can create a false sense of security within your comfort zone. To grow, you must be willing to step outside of it and face challenges.

Celebrating Small Wins

Recognize and celebrate your small victories. These moments of achievement can provide motivation and a sense of progress without the need for external validation.

The Role of Social Support

While it's essential to keep your goals private, seeking support and guidance from a mentor or coach can provide you with the tools and motivation to achieve your goals effectively.

The Art of Strategic Sharing

Selecting the Right Confidants

When you decide to share your goals, be selective in choosing confidants. Share with individuals who genuinely support your objectives and won't undermine your progress.

The Benefits of Limited Disclosure

Consider sharing the broader vision and milestones while keeping specific details to yourself. This ensures a balance between accountability and intrinsic motivation.

Cultivating Patience

Patience is crucial when working toward your goals. Success often takes time, and resisting the urge to share can help you stay on track without getting discouraged.

Overcoming the Need for Validation

To truly harness the power of keeping your goals to yourself, work on becoming less dependent on external validation. Find confidence and satisfaction in your progress.

Goals secrecy - elon musk strategy

The Power of Keeping Your Goals to Yourself: A Case Study

There's an old saying, "Loose lips sink ships," and when it comes to goal setting, this adage holds. Let's delve into the compelling reasons why keeping your goals to yourself is a strategy worth considering.

The Psychology Behind Secrecy

Psychologically, when you share your goals with others, you experience a premature sense of achievement. This satisfaction can reduce your motivation to put in the necessary effort to reach those goals. By keeping your goals under wraps, you maintain the intrinsic motivation required for success.

Fostering Intrinsic Motivation

When your goals are kept confidential, you become your own source of motivation. You are driven by the desire to accomplish your objectives rather than seeking external validation or praise. This intrinsic motivation can fuel your determination, leading to more significant accomplishments.

Avoiding Negative Feedback

Sharing your goals with others can invite criticism and negativity, which can be demotivating. By keeping your goals to yourself, you shield them from external scepticism, allowing them to flourish without unnecessary doubts.

Cultivating a Growth Mindset

A growth mindset is essential for achieving your goals. When you keep your objectives private, you're more likely to view setbacks as learning experiences rather than failures. This resilient approach can make a substantial difference in your journey toward success.

Boosting Self-Confidence

As you make progress toward your goals without external validation, your self-confidence grows. You begin to trust in your abilities, which is a vital component of achieving your objectives.

Harnessing the Element of Surprise

Revealing your accomplishments and goals after achieving them can lead to a delightful element of surprise for your friends, family, and colleagues. This surprise can be a rewarding experience, both for you and those close to you.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is it ever okay to share your goals with someone?

A: Yes, it can be beneficial to share your goals with a trusted mentor, coach, or a supportive friend who can provide guidance and encouragement.

How can I maintain accountability if I keep my goals secret?

A: You can use tools like a personal journal or a goal-tracking app to hold yourself accountable while still maintaining secrecy.

What if I'm afraid I'll lose motivation by keeping my goals to myself?

A: The key is to find a balance. Share your progress or milestones rather than the entire goal to maintain motivation.

Are there any scientific studies supporting the idea of keeping goals secret?

A: Yes, some studies suggest that sharing your goals can lead to a premature sense of accomplishment and reduced motivation.

Can keeping goals to myself apply to personal as well as professional goals?

A: Absolutely. This strategy is versatile and can be applied to any type of goal, whether personal or professional.

How can I deal with the pressure to share my goals due to societal expectations?

A: It's essential to prioritize your success over societal expectations. Focus on what works best for you.

Conclusion

In a world where sharing is encouraged, there's undeniable power in keeping your goals to yourself. By understanding the psychology and science behind this approach, setting SMART goals, and practising strategic sharing, you can maintain your motivation, stay on track, and achieve your aspirations. It's time to prioritize your journey over external validation and silence the doubters.

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Written by

Kamran Mansoor
Kamran Mansoor

Student: Software Engineer. Junior Flutter Developer Data Scientist == Entrepreneur 🤞. COMSATS' 24. @kamran_hccp