How Small Talk Can Boost Your Career and Get You Promoted

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Picture this: You're at work, head down, churning out projects like a machine. You're efficient, you're productive—you're doing exactly what's expected of you, right?

Well, not quite.

There's an invisible currency in the workplace that many of us overlook. It's not measured in ROI or any metrics.

It's measured in something immeasurable - your connections.

You know, those seemingly pointless conversations about the weather, your weekend, or what you had for lunch.

For many of us in the engineering world, small talk feels, well… like a waste of time.

But here’s the thing—small talk is actually a big deal. And not just in some fluffy, feel-good way. It can genuinely boost your career. Seriously.

For over a year, I've been diving deep into the concept of adaptability. And I’ve realized something fascinating—being adaptive isn’t just one skill. It’s built on four core pillars

These four pillars are the foundation of thriving in our rapidly changing world.

But today, we’re zooming in on one misunderstood pillar: Communication.

And when we talk about communication in the context of adaptability, we’re talking about something much more fundamental—and ironically, much more casual.

Small Talk.

Historical Context of Small Talk

Let’s take a quick trip back to 1923. An anthropologist named Bronisław Malinowski coined the term ‘phatic communion’. Just a fancy way of saying small talk.

Malinowski described it as a type of speech where connections are made simply through the exchange of words—nothing deep, nothing groundbreaking, just everyday chatter.

But here’s the interesting part: he recognized that this kind of talk, these seemingly meaningless words, actually create bonds between people. It’s a fundamental part of how human beings connect.

In a follow-up study, Coupland et al delved into the subtleties of phatic communion. They revealed that the simple phrase 'How are you?' is more than just a casual question—it's a social tool. It helps people navigate their roles in a conversation, express politeness, and even subtly influence the power dynamics at play.

I also came across an insightful HBR article titled 'The Surprising Power of Simply Asking Coworkers How They’re Doing.' According to a survey featured in the article, 39% of respondents said they feel the greatest sense of belonging when their colleagues check in with them, both personally and professionally."

Now that we have established the perceived benefits of small talk through research and content from respected sources, let me share my perspective on the subject of small talk

My Perspective

I have seen great leaders do small talk

I've had the good fortune of working in three different industries, and in every single company, one thing I've consistently noticed is the most successful leaders don’t dive straight into business.

They use small talk to start meetings, to ease the tension in the room, and to create a comfortable atmosphere.

It’s a simple gesture, but it's incredibly powerful and empathetic. They could just as easily dive into the agenda, but they choose to connect first.

My relationship with my managers

When it comes to my relationship with managers, the connection didn’t stop at work. I’ve bonded with great managers over WWE, comic-book movies, and football.

These conversations showed my personality and gave me a glimpse into theirs. This connection wasn’t just for fun—it helped me manage up more effectively.

And I believe it helped my managers understand how to coach me and deliver tough feedback in a way that I could truly absorb.

Working with colleagues

Working with colleagues across the globe, especially in different cultural contexts, small talk has been a game-changer.

Whenever I met a new colleague from outside India, I made sure to spend the first 10 minutes or so just chatting about anything other than work.

This laid a solid foundation for the meeting and, as a bonus, often led to lasting friendships.

Now that we’ve established why small talk matters, let me share three key benefits that can genuinely impact your career.

3 Key Benefits of Small Talk

Breaking the Ice

Small talk is a great way to ease into more serious discussions. When you engage in light conversation, you create a comfortable environment for deeper conversations later on.

Building Connections

Engaging in small talk allows you to connect with colleagues on a personal level. This connection can lead to trust, making it easier for you to collaborate and work effectively together.

Visibility

Regularly engaging in small talk increases your visibility within the organization. When people see you as approachable and friendly, they are more likely to think of you when opportunities arise.

So, how does all this translate into promotions?

The Impact on Promotions

Networking

The more connections you have, the more advocates you create within your organization. These advocates can vouch for your skills and work ethic when promotion opportunities arise.

Being Top of Mind

When you engage in small talk regularly, you keep yourself on the radar of decision-makers. They are more likely to think of you when considering candidates for promotions.

Creating Allies

Building relationships through small talk can lead to mentorship opportunities. Mentors can provide guidance, support, and even recommend you for promotions.

Conclusion

I’m not suggesting that small talk is the only key to promotions or the most important soft skill.

It’s important to recognize that this advice is based on the assumption that you’re already excellent at your job and fully deserving of that role.

But when the decision comes down to equally talented individuals, small talk can be the factor that sets you apart.

It’s the person who’s approachable, who connects well with others, and who’s seen as easy to work with that often comes to mind first.

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