Too Much of a Good Thing

If you have found honey, eat only enough for you, lest you have your fill of it and vomit it. (Proverbs 25:16)

James Clear made a point in chapter 8 of his book, "Atomic Habits" that gave some clarity to my recently held feeling about video games. Over the years I have held different opinions on the topic. In my late teens I was frustrated at adults' inability to articulate why video games were bad, and so I had produced a defense for them and spent countless hours playing them. I could not see how something so enjoyable that gave me friendship opportunity could be wrong. I was willing to admit that proportionality played a heavy role but would never admit an inherit negative dimension.

The real reason that I stopped playing them was that I married a girl. The vast majority of girls feel them to be the most unattractive activity a boy could do, so there's that. My wife went further than that and held them to be unacceptable uses of time outright. I did not protest because deep down I felt that she was right. Few men that I respected were catching dubs with the boys after their kids were in bed. I've had somewhat of a complex, love-hate feeling towards them since that point 4 years ago. They brought so much joy to my life and so I felt a certain appreciation for them, but I also was beginning to resent the life potential that they had consumed. That resentment grew into a disappointment that I now feel when I see other younger men walk the same path that I walked.

I have not pushed my opinions on others, however. I was scared that I would appear like those adults did to me: out of touch and inarticulate. That gets me back to the main point of the article. In his book on habits, James Clear lumps video games into the same category as social media, junk food, and pornography. All of these are extremes. Often a good thing becomes a bad thing when taken to its extreme (Prov 25:16). The desire for social acceptance and a feeling of belonging is fine when it leads to tightly knit, in-person communities. Getting the necessary amount of nutrients is great. Life long intimacy with one person is wonderful. The core motivations of each of these good desires, when unhinged, become poison. That is what I feel video games are for the good desire of play.

Don't mistake what I am trying to point out with this categorization. I am not trying to compare gaming to a vile sin. Rather, I am showing that the relation of video games to the good, "play" drive is similar to the relation of junk food with the good, "eating" drive, etc. The association is further confirmed when considering the addictive nature of each extreme. In the Bible, Paul says, "For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit" (Gal 5:17) and, "I will not be dominated by anything" (1 Cor 6:12). If a person has become a slave to a certain activity, they are living in their flesh and are forsaking the call of Christ to obedience.

It is precisely the addictive nature of video games that separates them in my mind from other forms of social play. You may now object that, if you are not controlled by your desire to play video games, it must be fine. Sure! Eating an occasional bag of Doritos is fine, but that does not mean it is an inherently healthy thing. No matter how hard you try, you will not be able to make Doritos good for you. They are, by nature, a bad thing, and when eaten chronically, will lead to bad health. Video games are not bad in small amounts, but that does not mean they are not inherently a negatively impacting activity. Just as junk food has optimized sugar, salt, and fat in the perfect way so as to overdrive our brain, video games have optimized the play drive in the perfect way to overdrive our brain. It's an unnatural and manipulative concoction.

You probably think that I have gone too far now. My goal isn't to make enemies or propagate any sort of judgement or shame on gamers. Most of my friends play games and I still enjoy them a lot myself. My modest goal in this article is to try and articulate the blanket claim laid on by many that video games are bad. If anything, I hope the correlations made in this article help you to understand why lots of people have that gut feeling about them. I would not hope that you come away feeling like I want you to never play games again. Rather, I hope you come away feeling like you should think about video games the same way that you would think about other abusable fleshly activities: with wisdom, moderation and control. A family night playing Wii Sports is just as great as a family outing for ice cream. Neither are wrong at face value, but potent things should be mitigated.

I heard once that video games are just wasted life-potential for young men. That stuck with me. Every hour spent killing brain cells with a controller in hand is one less hour spent investing in knowledge, fitness, career, family, religion and many other critical things young men need to be growing in. Every hour a 16-year-old spends on his gaming PC is pushing pause on his critical development into a mature man. You must count the cost.