A Practical Guide to Living Alone

Moving away from the comfort and security of home is a significant step, whether for education or work. You leave behind the warmth of family and step into a world where you must manage everything by yourself, from household chores to finances. Having been through this experience myself, I know firsthand how challenging yet rewarding it can be.

I didn’t just survive; I thrived, transitioning from a college student in Kolkata to a successful Machine Learning Engineer today. But my journey was far from smooth. I’ve lived in hostels, shared flats, and later, alone in my own place. Each phase taught me invaluable lessons that aren’t written in any guidebook—they come only with experience. This blog shares my personal journey and offers practical tips for those stepping out of their comfort zones for the first time. Whether you're moving out for college or work, these insights will help you navigate this life-changing experience.

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1. The Hostel Life: A Necessary Rite of Passage

I started my college life by moving from Durgapur to Kolkata, and like many first-timers, I chose to live in a hostel. Hostels, or PG accommodations, offer supervision, which can seem comforting when you're new to living alone. But what I didn’t realize then is that living in a hostel can either be the best or worst experience of your life—depending on your personality and outlook.

The Reality Check:

• Social Dynamics: If you're an extrovert or come from a background where being loud, carefree, and openly social is the norm, you’ll probably enjoy hostel life. You’ll meet diverse people, make lifelong friends, and perhaps even find your best years in that environment. But if you're introverted or come from a more conservative or disciplined family background, hostel life can be suffocating.

• Culture Shock: Many people in hostels are comfortable with behaviors that might be alien to you—drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes or weed, partying every day. Personally, I looked down on such activities, which made it harder for me to fit in. You might either adapt to the chaos around you or, like me, choose to withdraw and focus solely on your studies. I became reclusive, shutting out the noise and dedicating all my time to learning new technologies like web development, machine learning, and app development.

• Food Woes: Hostel food is a story of its own. If you're used to home-cooked meals, get ready to cry inside every day. The food quality in hostels is often terrible, and I missed my family’s cooking terribly. But even so, I recommend everyone to spend at least their first year in a hostel. Why? Because living through this “hell” helps you appreciate the comforts of independent living when you eventually move out.

In a nutshell, hostel life teaches you to survive amidst chaos, and it’s essential for building resilience. Without this experience, you won’t truly appreciate the freedom and comfort of living on your own or with a flatmate.

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2. The Shared Flat: A Taste of Freedom and Responsibility

By the end of my first year, I knew I couldn’t continue living in a hostel. The environment didn’t suit me, and I needed peace to focus on my studies. So, I moved into a 2 BHK rented flat with a flatmate I met in the hostel. This phase was the first real step toward independence, and it brought with it both freedom and responsibility.

The Reality Check:

• Grocery Runs: Back then, services like Blinkit and Instamart didn’t exist, so every month, we’d visit the supermarket to stock up on essentials. We also had to go weekly to buy fresh produce—vegetables, meat, and other perishables. I still remember taking turns with my flatmate to handle these grocery runs.

• Hiring Help: Neither of us knew how to cook, so we hired a maid who took care of cooking and cleaning. This was a huge relief, but the maid wasn’t always reliable. Sometimes she didn’t show up, and that forced us to improvise. I learned how to cook basic meals, and it turned out to be a skill I would use for the rest of my life.

• Maintaining the House: Shared responsibility is part of living with a flatmate. My flatmate and I took turns with tasks like buying raw food materials, cleaning, and maintaining the house. But there were times when I had to go beyond, especially when my girlfriend visited. I had to learn how to clean toilets and keep the house spotless to impress her. Even though I hated washing utensils, I avoided it by leaving them for the maid, knowing she’d come eventually. Still, the occasional necessity of cleaning taught me valuable lessons about household management.

This phase of living in a shared flat was much happier than the hostel days. With fewer distractions, I could focus more on my passion for machine learning, and by the second year, I became the first in my batch to secure an internship. Living with a flatmate teaches you compromise, shared responsibility, and a balance between freedom and duty.

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3. Living Alone: The Ultimate Test of Independence

After college, I moved to a 1 BHK rented flat, living completely on my own for the first time. This is where life took a sharp turn. Living alone brings a newfound sense of freedom, but it also means you’re responsible for everything—from cooking and cleaning to organizing and maintaining your space.

The Reality Check:

• Total Responsibility: Unlike my earlier experiences, I chose not to hire a maid this time. Most Indian men are conditioned to rely on their wives to manage household chores. But I wanted to be completely independent as I believe that is necessary for a happy marriage. This decision, though noble in intent, turned out to be far more challenging than I had anticipated.

• The Mess: My initial year living alone was chaotic. With no one to hold me accountable, I let the place fall apart. My kitchen was constantly full of unwashed dishes, the bathroom floors became dangerously slippery, and my bedroom had dust, hair, and clothes scattered everywhere. Amazon delivery packages were strewn across the floor, and with no wardrobe, I threw my clothes wherever I could. The house was littered with everything from wires to bottles, and soon enough, the place became unmanageable.

• The Wake-Up Call: After a year, I realized I couldn’t continue living in that mess. The state of my flat was affecting my focus and productivity. Eventually, I had to move out, start fresh, and make a conscious effort to live more responsibly. This phase taught me the importance of discipline, organization, and self-accountability.

Living alone is the ultimate test of adulthood. It forces you to confront your weaknesses, particularly in time management and self-discipline. But once you learn to manage everything, the sense of control and independence is incredibly rewarding.

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4. Lessons in Household Management: How I Turned My Life Around

After buying a new 2 BHK flat, I made it my mission to never let things spiral out of control again. Here are the lessons I learned, along with some practical tips for keeping a household in order when you’re living alone:

• Minimalism is Key: The less clutter you allow into your house, the easier it will be to keep things organized. Only buy things that you truly need or will use regularly. Too many unnecessary items ruin the aesthetic of your space, and once a place starts looking cluttered, you’ll be less inclined to clean or maintain it. Think of how minimalist hotels are—they have only what you need, and that’s what makes them look so tidy and peaceful.

• Clean as You Go: Never let the dishes pile up. It might seem like a small task, but cleaning your utensils right after eating can save you a world of trouble later. Make a habit of washing up before bed; trust me, waking up to a clean kitchen feels infinitely better than being greeted by a mountain of dirty plates.

• Get the Right Tools: One of the best investments I made was in a portable handheld vacuum cleaner. I use the 4000Pa one from Ambrane, and it’s a game-changer. It’s perfect for cleaning dust and hair off the floor and bed daily, especially if you're too busy to deep clean every day. Having the right tools makes cleaning much more manageable.

• Declutter Regularly: Make it a habit to throw away waste like plastics, delivery packages, and food wrappers every day. Keeping your space clutter-free ensures that any mess stands out, which makes it easier to stay on top of cleanliness. When you let clutter accumulate, it blends in with your surroundings, and before you know it, you’ve given up on cleaning altogether.

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5. Pro Tips for Financial Independence and a Low-Budget Lifestyle

Living away from home isn’t just about managing chores—it’s also about managing finances. In my first year, I survived on a monthly allowance of ₹10,000 from my family. That had to cover everything—rent, bills, groceries, transportation, and more. Even though my financial situation has vastly improved since then, I still stick to the same principles I learned during those early days.

• Budgeting: I used to calculate every purchase carefully. This habit stuck with me. Today, even though I earn handsomely and well above average, I limit my daily food expenses to around ₹300. I believe in living within my means, and this is something everyone should practice when living alone. Overindulgence leads to unnecessary stress down the line.

• Avoid Extravagant Purchases: I’ve never been one to spend crazy amounts on things like concert tickets or expensive sneakers. While some people splurge on ₹20,000 Jordans to keep up with trends, I stick to quality shoes under ₹4,000. Not only does this save money, but it also keeps me grounded. Living simply doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy life—it just means you’re smart about where you spend your money.

• Invest Wisely: Instead of spending frivolously, I invest my savings in stocks. My goal is to achieve financial independence and retire by 35 so that I no longer have to work to survive. Living alone teaches you to manage not just your space, but your financial future as well.

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Conclusion

Living away from home for the first time can be both exhilarating and terrifying. Whether you're moving into a hostel, sharing a flat with a friend, or living alone, each phase comes with its own set of challenges and lessons. From learning how to cook, clean, and budget to managing your time and mental well-being, the skills you acquire during this period will stay with you for life.

My journey from hostel life to living alone taught me more than just how to survive—it taught me how to thrive. These experiences shaped me into the independent, self-reliant person I am today. So embrace the challenges, make mistakes, and learn from them. Once you come out on the other side, you'll be stronger, more disciplined, and ready to take on anything life throws your way.