Getting to the Root of Death: Why We Fear It and How to Understand It

Death. It’s the one thing we all have in common, yet most of us try to avoid thinking about it for as long as possible. But why? What is it about death that makes it so unsettling? To understand, we must get to the root—unpack the fears, the beliefs, and the experiences that shaped our view of it.

What Triggered This Conversation?

Maybe it was a personal loss. Perhaps it was a close call—one of those moments that jolts you into realizing how fragile life is. Or maybe, like many, it was just one of those late-night thoughts that sneak up on you:

What happens after we die?
Will I be remembered? Did I live the way I was supposed to?

These questions don’t just come out of nowhere. They come from somewhere deep inside us, a place shaped by past experiences, societal norms, and personal fears.

Looking Back: What in the Past Shaped Our Fear of Death?

Our relationship with death didn’t start today. It’s been forming since childhood, shaped by the things we were told (or not told), the people we lost, and the way death was handled in our homes.

Think about it:

• Were you raised in a family that openly talked about death, or was it something whispered about behind closed doors?

• Did you experience loss at a young age, and if so, how was it explained to you?

• Were you taught to see death as a transition, an ending, or something to be feared?

Culturally, death is often painted as a tragedy, something dark and final. But in some traditions, it’s seen as a natural cycle—something to be embraced rather than feared. The way we process death depends largely on the narrative we grew up with.

Getting to the Root: Why Does Death Scare Us?

If we break it down, our fear of death usually falls into a few core categories:

1. Fear of the Unknown – What happens after? Is there an after? The uncertainty is unsettling.

2. Fear of Nonexistence – The idea that one day, we might just… not be. It’s a tough concept to wrap our minds around.

3. Fear of Suffering – Many don’t fear death itself, but the process of dying—whether it will be painful, lonely, or prolonged.

4. Fear of Losing Others – Sometimes, it’s not our own death we fear, but the pain of losing the people we love.

5. Fear of Regret – The thought of running out of time before doing what we wanted or becoming who we hoped to be.

These fears don’t just exist in a vacuum—they’re deeply rooted in our experiences, beliefs, and even societal conditioning.

Why Talking About Death Matters

The more we avoid death, the more power it holds over us. But when we confront it—when we ask the hard questions and sit with the discomfort—it starts to lose its grip.

Talking about death doesn’t make it come faster; it makes life more meaningful. It helps us appreciate the present, prioritize what truly matters, and let go of unnecessary fears.

So, What Now?

Getting to the root of death isn’t about finding one perfect answer—it’s about exploring the questions that help us make peace with it. Maybe that means reflecting on your personal beliefs, having an open conversation with someone you trust, or simply sitting with your thoughts instead of pushing them away.

Because in the end, understanding death isn’t really about death at all—it’s about learning how to truly live.

So, What Now? Choose Yourself. Choose Chi’va.

Getting to the root of death isn’t about finding one perfect answer—it’s about exploring the questions that help us make peace with it. Maybe that means reflecting on your personal beliefs, having an open conversation with someone you trust, or simply sitting with your thoughts instead of pushing them away.

And if you’re looking for a way to process it all—Chi’va might be the answer. Chi’va is about balance, presence, and deep connection to self. It offers a path to understanding life and death, not through fear, but through clarity. Through movement, breath, and mindfulness, Chi’va can help you embrace life fully, making peace with what’s to come.

You have a choice. Choose to live fully. Choose to embrace your fears. Choose Chi’va.