From Coach to Awakener

Book written in 2003 by Robert Dilts, a key figure in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). The handbook, divided into 8 chapters and 322 pages (in the italian edition), aims to define the role of the "Coach" with a capital "C," understood as a set of capacities and functions that, according to the author, go beyond traditional coaching, to support personal growth and self-realization at a deeper level. In the book, the author presents many NLP concepts, focusing them on the figure of the Coach.

Takeaways

Dilts outlines a multidimensional Coach profile, integrating diverse competencies to offer complete and transformative support. These capacities develop progressively and act in synergy. The author builds the entire handbook starting from two basic concepts:

• Levels of Learning: Environment, Behavior, Capabilities, Beliefs and Values, Identity, and Spirit. The Coach with a capital "C" must be able to support the Coachee across all six levels of knowledge.

• Double-Loop Learning: The coaching/modeling cycle, according to Dilts, is the tool to combine the "what" (the coaching goal) with the "how" (the modeling instrument). Thus, this double cycle uses NLP modeling to support the achievement of the coaching objective.

For each level of learning, the Coach must adopt different capacities to support their client, or groups of clients.

• Guiding and Caretaking: Creating a safe and favorable environment for change, preventing distractions and protecting the process. It is the foundation upon which every supportive relationship is built.

• Coaching (lowercase "c"): Improving behavioral performance through observation, feedback, and clear objective setting. It focuses on "doing" and the effectiveness of action.

• Teaching: Developing new competencies and thinking abilities (capabilities) in the client, transferring useful knowledge and strategies for learning and growth.

• Mentoring: Guiding the discovery of unconscious potential and the overcoming of internal blocks, positively influencing beliefs and values. It is a process of unlocking inner wisdom.

• Sponsorship: Recognizing and valuing the essence and identity of the client, celebrating their talents and promoting their excellence. An act of deep trust in the other's potential.

• Awakening: The highest capacity, connecting the client to their vision, mission, and spirit. It means creating contexts and experiences that reveal the best part of the individual, aligning them with their most authentic and profound purposes.

The Book

In the first introductory chapter, the author defines the conceptual foundations, outlining the evolution and vision of the "Coach" within the NLP context.

• Origins and Evolution of Coaching: Where coaching originates and how it has evolved.

• Coach (Capital C) vs. coaching (lowercase c): Fundamental distinction between the comprehensive role and the specific function.

• NLP and Coaching: The intrinsic link between NLP and the proposed coaching model.

• Coaching-Modeling Cycle: The relationship between coaching processes and modeling.

• Levels of Learning and Change: How change occurs at different layers in individuals and organizations.

In the subsequent 3 chapters, Dilts describes: Guiding and Caretaking, Coaching with a lowercase "c," and Teaching.

Guiding and Caretaking: The Context of Support. The starting point for any effective intervention is the creation of a safe and fertile environment. Dilts emphasizes how "guiding" and "caretaking" are essential to support the client in a context where change can occur without obstacles. This implies not only providing clear directions but also actively preventing unnecessary distractions or interferences that could derail the coachee's journey. The coach becomes a true "guardian angel", offering fundamental support. Tools like "psychogeography," which analyzes spatial relationships and interactions, and "causal loop maps", which raise awareness of systemic dynamics, are examples of how the coach can structure a protected environment oriented towards the client's well-being, allowing them to move and act with confidence. It's about ensuring that everything needed is available and that external factors do not generate unnecessary disturbances, allowing the client to focus on their own process.

Coaching (lowercase "c"): Performance and Feedback. When Dilts speaks of "coaching" (with a lowercase "c"), he refers specifically to the ability to support a person in achieving or improving a specific behavioral performance. This capacity often draws inspiration from sports training models, where the goal is to refine skills and awareness of resources. An effective coach at this stage carefully observes the client's behaviors, providing precise feedback and targeted encouragement. It's not just about telling what to do, but about helping the coachee develop greater inner flexibility and a deep understanding of their actions. The first important concept is to define a well-formed objective, and to be so, it must have these characteristics:

* The objective must be expressed positively: what does the coachee want?

* The objective must be verifiable through the senses: how will it be verified that the objective has been achieved? What are the evaluation criteria?

* The objective must be initiated and maintained by the client: the objective must belong to the client, who must have control over the objective's realization process.

* The desired state (the objective) must preserve all positive effects of the present state: The coach and coachee must foresee the effects that the objective will produce on the coachee and their operating context.

* The objective must be appropriately contextualized: it must be ecological; the conditions under which the objective must be achieved and the conditions under which it is not worth achieving must be defined.

Tools such as feedback, contrastive analysis (comparing different maps to find the differences that make a difference), and intermapping are crucial for making the client aware of the physical and mental factors that influence their performance. Defining clear and measurable objectives is, in this context, the core that provides direction and focus for all coaching activities, ensuring that energy is well channeled towards concrete results.

Teaching: Acquiring and Developing New Competencies. Teaching, according to Dilts, focuses on the ability to help a person develop new competencies and, in particular, to build new "thinking abilities." The coach who "teaches" is the one who provides the client with the tools and knowledge necessary to operate more effectively in the world. This can include introducing new strategies, mental models, or conceptual frameworks. The goal is to equip the client with new cognitive and behavioral resources that make them more autonomous and capable of facing complex challenges. It involves facilitating the learning of more useful "models of the world" and developing the client's ability to access and reuse these new strategies in future contexts, promoting lasting and applicable growth.

Continuing the analysis of the capacities that constitute the "Coach" with a capital "C," Robert Dilts guides us through roles increasingly oriented towards self-discovery and the realization of the individual's deepest potential.

Mentoring: Unlocking Unconscious Potential. The role of Mentoring, in Dilts' view, goes beyond the simple transfer of knowledge. It is the capacity to guide a person to discover and activate their unconscious competencies, often hidden by resistance or internal interferences. An effective mentor helps the coachee recognize their positive intentions, even when these manifest in seemingly limiting behaviors. The goal is to positively influence the client's beliefs and values, fostering a process of self-discovery that leads them to overcome deeply rooted obstacles. The mentor acts as a guide who illuminates the less explored areas of the coachee's psyche, helping to bring forth "inner wisdom" and unlock latent resources, essential for authentic and lasting growth.

Sponsorship: Recognizing and Valuing Essence. Sponsorship is one of the most powerful and generous capacities described by Dilts. It consists of the process of identifying and recognizing the deepest essence and identity of another person. The "sponsor" does not limit themselves to superficial support but focuses on highlighting the individual's unique potential and intrinsic talents, celebrating their successes, and actively contributing to their well-being and excellence. It is an act of unconditional trust, of "seeing" the other in their totality and greatness, and communicating this value to them so they can recognize and realize it in turn. A good sponsor creates value for others, becoming a catalyst for their success and the expression of their excellence. Positive and proactive sponsorship messages play a crucial role in strengthening bonds and building a productive future.

Awakening: Connecting to Vision, Mission, and Spirit. "Awakening" represents the highest and most integrated capacity in Dilts' model, the culmination of the other functions. It is not a sequential step but a synthesis and expression of the "Coach" with a capital "C" that includes the level of vision, mission, and spirit. This capacity consists of supporting the client by providing contexts and experiences that bring out the best part of their being, connecting them deeply with love, authentic self, and the spiritual dimension of their existence. The one who "awakens" operates with integrity and congruence, facilitating an alignment between the person and their highest and most meaningful purposes. A fundamental condition for "awakening" is the ability to reach a state of "non-knowing," allowing fresh and objective insights. Being in "uptime," meaning a state of maximum attention and awareness, is crucial for directing attention to the "here and now," fully opening to the senses and creating an unobstructed channel for unconscious competencies. "Awakening" is, in essence, bringing to consciousness what was previously unconscious, facilitating a profound transformation.

Conclusions

"From Coach to Awakener" by Robert Dilts proves to be much more than a simple text on coaching; it is a true immersion in a complete and integrated approach to human support and development. It is important to emphasize how the work is deeply rooted in the concepts and methodologies of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). For this reason, a basic knowledge of NLP principles greatly facilitates the understanding and assimilation of the numerous concepts Dilts introduces.

Reading this handbook is not always immediately easy. The text is rich in complex and layered concepts, requiring attention and often a re-reading to be fully contextualized and assimilated. It is not a "read-and-go" book, but a work to study, digest, and apply progressively.

Personally, reading this book has enriched me enormously. I learned coaching at the International Coaching University (ICU) and practice it every day; I still consider that version my preferred one. This book, however, has made me discover that there is also another approach, equally valid, which proves to be extremely useful. Understanding how Dilts defines and integrates the various capacities of the "Coach" with a capital "C", from guiding to awakening, broadens the vision of how one can support others. It is an invitation to consider that multiple paths exist to facilitate growth, and that the diversity of approaches is not a contradiction, but a source of further value and opportunity for professional development. A book that encourages reflection and the integration of new dimensions into one's way of conceiving support and accompaniment to change.