6 Days Before Beast Mode: The Honest Chaos Before Transformation

“And then there are days when showing up feels like war — even if all you do is breathe.”

It’s 9th July today. I’m six days away from launching something I’ve called Beast Mode — a 3-year personal mission to transform my life, career, and confidence from the inside out.

But here’s the truth?

I don’t feel like a beast right now.

I feel tired.
College has already started throwing assignments and lectures my way.
And even when I try to rest, my brain just… won’t.

So I lie there. Scrolling. Overthinking.
And the next morning, I wake up already behind.

📌 I said I’d prepare. But I feel like I’m falling.

I’ve made promises to myself.

That I’ll learn Terminal.
That I’ll master Git.
That I’ll write blogs, build a brand, and one day walk into Stanford or FAANG like I was born for it.

But right now? I’m just trying to keep my eyes open after college lectures.
My energy is all over the place. My mind is noisy. My body wants rest. And every time I scroll past someone who already built a project, or posted a hackathon win, or shared a polished LinkedIn update — I flinch.

I flinch because deep down, I wonder:
Will I be able to do it? Or am I already falling behind?

💡 But then I pause… and breathe.

And I remember:
This moment — the hard one, the quiet one — is also part of the story.

Because transformation doesn’t always look like coding for 10 hours.
Sometimes, it looks like learning just one command.
Sometimes, it looks like whispering an affirmation into the mirror.
Sometimes, it looks like crying, journaling, or just... not giving up today.

🌕 So here's where I stand:

I may not have finished learning everything I wanted before July 15.
I may still be struggling with my sleep schedule, or adjusting to the rhythm of college again.
But I am here.
Still here.
Still showing up — even if it's messy, unproductive, or slow.

And honestly? That’s more than enough.