Reduce Job Burnout Fast by Mastering Workplace Presence

This article is a continuation of a review of Andrea Gomez's book called “Burnout to Balance: Your 8-Step Guide to Thriving in a Messy Workplace”, now available where ever you get you audiobooks and books.

If you missed Chapter 1 and Step 1, you can read it here: Burnout to Balance: Spot the Warning Signs of Toxic Job Stress.

Let’s get into Chapter 2, Step 2…

The Hidden Source of Your Burnout

Step 2: How You’re Being Perceived on the Job

The author helps you see why burnout keeps happening, even when you’re trying to fix things. This step looks at how you act at work and how you’re perceived, and how those might not match. That gap can feed into your stress without you realizing it.

How your manager sees you, how coworkers treat you, and how your team responds all shape your day. It usually comes down to two things: whether people feel comfortable around you and whether they believe you know what you’re doing.

If you're too approachable, people like you but don't take you seriously. If you're focused on looking competent, they respect you but keep their distance. Finding a balance between approachability and credibility affects how people respond to you, how much they listen, and how much stress you carry.

A good balance means you can lead without coming off as aggressive. You set boundaries and earn respect without pushing people around or acting like a control freak. You know when to step up and when to back off. Someone with that balance doesn’t need to boss people around or fish for compliments. They’re fine with disagreements and don’t take them personally. Genuine respect comes from trust, not fear.

The author says, unlike people who play games or chase attention, a balanced person doesn’t treat coworkers like tools to get ahead. They don’t need to win every time or take over the spotlight. They can take pushback without falling apart. They care about getting along but don’t need to be the center of everything. A balanced boss can assign tasks without hovering, fix mistakes without making you feel small, and lead without controlling everything. A balanced coworker can speak up without scheming or looking for validation.

In short, balancing warmth and competence means being confident without stepping on toes, clear without being harsh, and focused on your role without micromanaging everyone else.

The Workplace Balancing Act: Approachability vs. Credibility

Every time you walk into work, send an email, or talk to your team, you’re showing people how to treat you. Gomez breaks this into two things: approachability and credibility. Approachability means being friendly, easy to talk to, and open to helping. It builds trust. Credibility is about looking confident, making clear decisions, and proving you know what you’re doing. That earns respect.

You need both. You want people to feel comfortable around you and still take you seriously. Most people lean too far in one direction and end up overwhelmed. She says once you figure out where you land, it’s easier to understand why work feels so off.

The Two Personality Types That Lead Straight to Burnout

Trap 1: Too Approachable, Not Respected

The book says, when you’re all about being nice, you turn into everyone’s go-to. People lean on you, vent, and ask for favors. You’re the one they like, but not the one they follow. You say yes too often and end up drowning in everyone else’s problems.

Here’s what that looks like:

You get buried in work because people know you won’t push back
You’re overlooked for leadership roles because you seem helpful, not strong
You get interrupted in meetings or your input gets skipped
You’re left cleaning up the team drama while others coast along

Burnout is serious here because you’re stretched way too thin. You’re so busy saving everyone else that your own stuff falls apart. And when you finally hit empty, no one notices until you drop.

Being kind is fine, but there’s a point where it starts working against you. You don’t have to be open and available every second. Sometimes, keeping a little distance earns you more respect than being everyone’s sounding board.

If someone keeps offloading on you, shut it down without drama. Body language works. Cross your arms, lean back, keep it short. And when you’re ready to exit, try these:

“Alright, I’ve got to get back to work.”
“I’ll let you go.”
“I need to handle something quick.”

Each one is polite, but clear. No need to overexplain.

Trap 2: Too Credible, Not Liked

If you’re all about being capable, you’re the one people count on to get things done. They follow your lead, yet they don’t know you. You’re respected, but not invited in.

You’ll notice this:

People follow instructions but don’t open up
You get called serious, blunt, hard to read, or maybe even scary
You’re left out of casual convos and group chats
People complain to each other about your tone even when you’re being fair

Burnout builds here because you end up isolated. You’re capable, but you don’t feel connected. When people can’t read you, they start assuming things and not always good things.

You don’t have to turn into the office comic., just open up slightly. Tidy your desk, put your phone away, relax your posture. Face people directly. Make eye contact, and smile. In meetings, step out from behind your laptop or move around a little. These little things change how others experience you without changing who you are.

How to Find Your Workplace Sweet Spot

Going too far in either direction doesn’t work. Too warm, and people pile things on you. Too credible, and you get left out. Gomez says finding balance is what reduces the stress.

If you're too warm, set limits. Try, “Let me check my work first,” instead of saying yes right away. If someone keeps venting, say, “I hear you, but maybe talk to the boss about it.” You don’t need to be rude, just clear.

If you're leaning too hard on competence, ease into conversations. Say, “I get where you’re coming from,” before jumping into a bunch of instructions. A bit of conversation first helps people listen better.

Use warmth to build trust. Use competence to stay in control. Start a meeting by acknowledging someone’s work, then move forward with what needs to get done. You don’t need to shrink into yourself, or do Academy Award acting. Just pay attention to how people respond to you and how much effort you’re putting into handling them. Practice how you want to sound before hand so you’re ready when it counts.

Fix How You’re Seen at Work to Lower Burnout

Understanding how you show up at work is a major step toward cutting down on stress. The author makes it clear it’s not so much about workload, but about how people read you. Finding that middle ground between being likable and respected helps you deal without burning out. It comes down to knowing how you carry yourself, and present yourself to others.

Have a burnout story or recovery win? Add it in the comments.

Originally written for Medium. Edited for my Hashnode readers.

Chapters 3–8 go into broken boundaries, what drains your energy, how to handle bad managers, coworkers, and HR, how to get your drive back, whether your job can survive AI, when it’s time to leave, and more. If you want the full roadmap, grab your copy of: 📘Burnout to Balance: Your 8-Step Guide to Thriving in a Messy Workplace

eBook & Paperback on Amazon
eBook on Google Books
Audiobook for easy listening on the go
🎧Want to sample it out for free? Listen to Burnout to Balance 2025 Podcast on Spotify.

www.burnouttobalanceguide.com

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